Barnes & Conti's First Newsletter! November 2001

Barnes & Conti is excited to bring you this inaugural issue of our newsletter. We hope to be updating our friends, colleagues, and clients about six times a year with articles to inform, inspire, and increase your skills. We also want to share with you what's going on with us, and include a recipe, a poem, a story, or even a laugh or two. Frequent visitors to our web site may have seen a few of the items here; we wanted to share these items with an even wider readership.

It's no small coincidence that our first issue has a Thanksgiving theme. We're thankful for each and every one of you for trusting us to help move your companies and organizations forward, or--as we like to say--move your ideas into action. We want to publish and circulate this newsletter as a small token of our gratitude and appreciation.

In the spirit of appreciation and adding value, please let us know what you'd like to see in our newsletter. We welcome your input and your submissions. Please reply to newsletter@barnesconti.com



In this Issue:

  • "Influencing Under Stress," by B. Kim Barnes
  • News Item--Barnes &Conti to donate 1% of 4th Quarter revenue to UNICEF
  • New Program--From Expert to Trainer: Skills for Leading Learning Sessions
  • "Dealing with Devastating Change," by B. Kim Barnes
  • Thanksgiving, Influence, and Appreciation: A Recipe for Your Thanksgiving Table
  • What to Do (Thoughts for Thanksgiving and Troubled Times)

Influencing Under Stress

B. Kim Barnes

Since the events of September 11, many of us may have experienced an unusual level of stress. Those tragic events have been shocking and horrifying and have brought a degree of uncertainty to many aspects of our business and personal lives. At the same time, it is more important than ever that we do our work and conduct our relationships with grace and effectiveness. I want to share some thoughts with those of you who have participated in Exercising Influence: Building Relationships and Getting Results as to how you may want to apply some of the skills and principles you have learned at this difficult time in all of our lives.

Right after a disaster, whether of natural or human origin, there is a tendency for people who have shared the loss to pull together. Differences are put aside, the barriers between people go down, common goals and values are emphasized. Once the initial shock has worn off and the common tasks have differentiated once again, that sense of camaraderie and alignment may begin to wear off and be replaced by more individual concerns, fears, and vested interests. This can translate to greater work place stress--and stress in the work place often leads to unproductive conflict. While we are fully aligned and working toward a common goal, influence is hardly needed--good, clear communication is enough. Once that time has passed, however, we need to be especially conscious of the way we are influencing. Those of us who have had an opportunity to develop our influence skills can play a very productive role in the coming weeks and months. Leaders, managers, and team members can be conscious of choosing and using specific behaviors that will help to achieve successful results.

Some of the behaviors are Expressive; that is, they send your ideas toward the other party. The others are Receptive in nature; that is, they invite the other party to send their ideas to you. In managing and resolving conflict, it is often wise to begin with Receptive behaviors. A balance between expressive and receptive energy is always important. It is essential under conditions of stress and conflict. Many behaviors from Exercising Influence: Building Relationships and Getting Results are useful in conflict situations and in dealing with colleagues who seem to be experiencing increased stress.


For the full text of this article click here


What's New at Barnes & Conti?

Barnes and Conti to Donate 1% of
4th Quarter Revenue to UNICEF

We wanted to do a little more this holiday season; we chose to donate to UNICEF because of their focus on children and their ability to provide humanitarian aid where it may be difficult for other organizations to do so. And last, but not least, we wanted to parallel the humanitarian efforts of our country in the best way possible; UNICEF has a massive effort underway to provide relief for children in Afghanistan and refugees in Pakistan.

To read more about UNICEF's work with Afghan children:
http://www.unicefusa.org/unicefusa/press_092801.html
http://unicef.org/noteworthy/afghanistan/index.html


New program:
From Expert to Trainer:
Skills for Leading Learning Sessions

We're pleased to offer a two-day workshop geared towards helping people who are new or "occasional" trainers to learn the skills they need to effectively change behavior and transfer knowledge without merely presenting information. Participants will be taught to "model" effective training techniques, learning the approaches, structures, and methods that are being taught. Class size is limited to eight people to maximize personal feedback.

This program was developed originally for Sun Microsystems by our friend and colleague, Lynne Lombardo, with contributions by Kim and other members of the Barnes & Conti staff. Because Lynne's work with "occasional" trainers at Sun has been so successful, we wanted to offer the program to a larger audience.

For more information click here


Dealing with Devastating Change

B. Kim Barnes

In the aftermath of the terrorist attack of September 11, 2001, I, along with legions of others around the planet, was horrified and nearly paralyzed. I wanted to do something, anything, to help those directly affected or to take some action that would guarantee that no such hateful act should ever take place again. As the days have passed, it has become more and more clear that the most important thing that I can do is to be part of the healing

Ten years ago, the huge fire that raged through the hills of Oakland, California destroyed our house. As part of the healing and rebuilding process, I wrote an article focusing on sudden change, entitled "The Fire this Time: Coping With Sudden Imposed Change." The article contains some of the ideas that were so helpful to me in what seems to me now like a minor event compared to what we are currently experiencing. I think the principles apply to those of us who are coping with the aftermath, with recovering our faith in the future and in one another.

To read the article click here



Thanksgiving, Appreciation, and Influence

Appreciation can do nothing but strengthen existing influence relationships. Appreciation expresses encouragement and can help strengthen shared values and goals. Few things express appreciation as well as delicious and well-prepared food for friends, family, and colleagues. In the spirit of Thanksgiving, we wanted to express our appreciation, and help you express your appreciation by exercising influence gastronomically. Short of sending you food, we're including this recipe, the creation of our resident gourmand (and web master), Joel Kleinbaum. The recipe is suitable for your Thanksgiving dinner, and is a change from the usual very sweet sweet potatoes.

Pureed Curried Squash and Sweet Potatoes

1 large butternut squash (you can also use 2 sugar pumpkins)
2 medium sweet potatoes or yams
1 apple, sliced thin (peel it if you like)
2 tablespoons butter (unsalted is best)
Optional, toasted pecans or walnuts .
Nutmeg (grate it fresh if you can!)
Pinch of salt
Curry Powder

Peel the squash as best you can, cut it into manageable pieces (discard the seeds and membrane inside) and boil until tender. Do the same with the sweet potatoes (or leave the peeling, if you don't mind the lumps). Drain both well, and mash them together with some butter. Moisten with a little milk or stock (only if necessary) to get a smooth puree. Mix in 1/2 teaspoon or more of grated nutmeg and  1-2 teaspoons of good curry powder (you might want to augment the curry with some allspice and or ground cloves, taste it to see). Spread the mixture into a baking dish (a round soufflé dish works well).

Sauté the apple slices briefly in butter, and top the puree with a layer of apple slices. Sprinkle with toasted walnuts or pecans. (You can also sprinkle with brown sugar if you want something sweeter). Dot the top with butter. Bake at 350 degrees for 20-30 minutes. Serves six (or more, depending on the size of your squash and sweet potatoes).

Note: The sweet potatoes and squash need to be in balance for this dish to hold together, that is the starch in the sweet potatoes binds the squash into a firm puree. If--before putting the puree into its baking dish--the puree seems runny or watery, try adding bread crumbs to the mixture. You can also use a food processor to puree, but be careful not to over process.

Joel says that his two favorite turkey wines go well with this dish--a dry or slightly off dry Gewurztraminer, and a light, fruity Pinot Noir.


Thoughts for Thanksgiving and Troubled Times

What to Do

Source Unknown

Let all things be healthy,
Let all things be peaceful.
Count your blessings at least once a day
Forgive those who have hurt you
Forgive those who have offended you
Forgive yourself for what you have done
and what you fear to do
What is done, there is no need to speak of
What has passed, there is no need to blame
Have self-knowledge, self respect,
and courage to dare.

Strive to make the spot where you stand beautiful
Then harmony, happiness and longevity will
Follow you all of your days in all of your ways


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